Circulo Vicioso [Reacción en Cadena]

Aquí me encuentro una vez más, desgarrándome entre canciones que subyugan mi memoria, preguntándome como es que he vuelto a llegar a este punto; el cliché de la rutina, del tiempo transcurrido; El imán consecuente, la sombra perseguidora.

Nuevas (?) ilusiones que se rompen en el caudal, ilusiones generadas por expectativas. Expectativas suicidas engendradas por un deseo [autodestructor], suicidas por querer acabar con los sentimientos avivantes, del más frecuente al más obsoleto e inconstante; autodestructor, porque todo conlleva a lo anterior. Sentimientos frecuentes e inconstantes que reviven el alma, aplacados por los sentimientos más oscuros y febriles, pero que con una luz diminuta pueden esclarecer lo más recóndito del ser. Luces intermitentes que aparecen en la oscuridad para disolverla [momentáneamente], por esta misma razón son luces oscuras, pues generan expectativas, por ende ilusiones… Cerrando así  este interminable círculo vicioso…. Interminable hasta el momento que concluya en la muerte...

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We walk in circles. We love in circles. We talk in circles. We live in circles. I can't live like this. i can't live like this. i can't keep living this. i can't keep living this again. we're always moving on, always moving back. back to the same place. so familiar, but it isn't home...

just where we come to forget. how many times can you write the same song in a different way? how many times can you live the same life on a different day? nobody lives in circles, they just forget. they just survive. we live in circles, the same people with different faces. we sing the same songs in different keys. we love in circles, a little less with every turn. i've never loved like that before, and i don't think i will again. and it's coming back again, it's ending where it started. and i'd give everything to do it all again. 

you never love like that again (the first time), and the longer that you live, the less you feel alive. and we don't die for anything  anymore. i'd kill to feel like that again, but i'm never going to  feel like that again. so move on, hold on, or fucking fake it. either  way, we're losing. either way i'm losing. remember when this was everything? in a way, it still is. i want to feel that way again. 

but you don't feel in circles, you just live. you just fall. i'll  find it again, in a different place. in a different time, with a  different face. i'll keep moving, because i've got to keep moving. 

just take whatever's left. my heart is dry. this is my last breath. 

this used to be everything. i gave everything.

Killing The Dream - Resolution